Where art thou mojo?

Yes.  Hello.  It has been some time since I posted, has it not?

So long that we have a new president.

Oh, wait.

Not so much.

Anyways, I haven't blogged for a number of reasons.  Mainly, I've lost my blogging mojo and have yet to locate it.  I think I've determined that it must be tied up in my Sonic drinks.  And I haven't had one in months.  Because of the whole pregnancy thing.  You know, trying to be ueber healthy for baby and all that.

The hubs and I, per usual, are a few to 10 years behind on current tv trends.  Therefore we have been consumed with watching all of the episodes of Lost on Netflix.

That was quite the time investment. But, alas, we persevered.

And I have to say that I am relieved to be through with it.  I know there are some diehard Lost fans, but after Season 3, I just thought the writers seemed desperate for a storyline. 

In addition to growing a human inside of myself and keeping the other two little humans I grew alive and well, I have been working on the quilt for baby #3.  I finished the back and front and made the "quilt sandwich" last night.  Now I just need to quilt it and add the border.

the front

back

Since we don't find out the gender of our babies ahead of time and I have made a quilt for each of our kids while pregnant with them, it is quite the challenge for me to make a gender neutral quilt that the hubs approves of.  What do you think?  Gender neutral?  Or erring on the side of boy?  I'm happy with it but definitely think it looks more boy-like.

And for posterity, I'll leave you with a picture of my sweet little animals from Halloween.  They are such sweet blessings, on good and bad days alike.

Friends Across The Seas

When I went off to college, I went to a small school where I basically knew no one.  I think there were maybe 2 people from my high school that went to the same college as me.  Most of my high school friends went to large colleges and universities where they knew many others.

Since I basically didn't know anyone, I was doing the "potluck" roommate thing, where you are at the mercy of some college life office to place you in a room with someone who hopefully isn't too crazy.

My potluck roommate, Katie, ended up being one of the best things that happened to me at college.

And, she wasn't too crazy!

(I hope she can say the same thing for me).

Katie lives overseas and I haven't seen her in four years (the time she initially moved).  Her oldest daughter was less than a year at the time. Her and her husband, Chris, and (now) 2 kids are back for a few months and I got to see them this past week.  And our kids got to meet each other and play.

It was so wonderful to see them all.  I spent the whole day with her and only scratched the surface of what I wanted to ask and talk to her about (Does she still have the chapstick habit? Does she still dance to Arethra Franklin?  Does she still watch reruns of The Cosby Show and Fullhouse?  Is "super" still her favorite adjective of all time?  You know, important questions!) 

She is such a dear friend and I was so thrilled to catch up with her.

our oldest kids - instant buds

sweet hugs

right before the fire ant incident of 2012

Glimmers

Most days as a parent, I pretty much am keenly aware of all the things I'm not doing well.  Or the things the kids are doing too much of (tv) or too little of (veggies).

Yesterday morning, I was trying to hurry to make an appointment.  I was doing all the last minute scurrying and Little Miss started crying in the other room.  This is not unusual.  I could tell it was more of a disgruntled cry than a something-is-really-wrong cry.  So, I did my typical, "What's wrong, sweetie?" and "I'll be right there" lines while I quickly trying to get everything together.

I went to check on her a minute later and I saw Happy holding her head and leaning in towards her.  At first, I thought he had her in a headlock.  But as I got closer, I could hear him saying something quietly to her and then he said an exuberant, "Amen!". 

I realized he was praying for her because she was upset. How precious.

When I don't know how to comfort my children or I can't get them to calm down, I just pray for them. Happy was doing the same for Little Miss.

It was a sweet glimmer of hope and an encouragement to me.

Sweet Memories

A couple of weeks ago, I had to go to the OB to get an early screening for gestational diabetes. 

Because the screening that comes later in pregnancy is not enough fun already. They wanted to treat me to one twice.  How kind. 

(That, or the fact that I have small babies is a concern for them and they wanted to make sure something hasn't been overlooked in past pregnancies.)

Happy has this complex with doctors and nurses touching me.  He screams and cries VERY LOUDLY, which in turn, fires up Little Miss.  It makes a trip to the OB with them extra special and delightful. A real memory maker.

Add in a fasting pregnant woman consuming a sugar poison glucose drink to Happy's aversion to nurses touching me and you have a real recipe for disaster. I decided to let Mom and Dad watch the kids while I ran over to the doctor's office for my blood work.

When I got to my parents' house, Dad wanted to pull out his childhood train set for my little train nut, Happy, to play with.  I have fond memories of playing with that train set with my dad as a child.  And it was so precious to see him playing with the kids. 

I am so very thankful for new memories being made with Dad.

(And also thankful that I passed the diabetes test.)

Easter Pics

I took these forever ago, but never posted them.

Better late than never, right?

Right.

Free Wood. Or Free Labor. However You May Look at it.

I haven't blogged about anything other than Dad for months.  It's hard to recover your blogging mojo after dealing with life threatening illness.  (Dad is better.  He is now in a nursing home and making improvements.)

Anyways, what better to re-enter my mundane blogging than a funny little picture?  For the record, Hubs does not find the same level of humor in this as I do.  I am hoping someone else can appreciate this.

I pass this plot of land on my way to the in-laws house.  Recently, a large tree fell down after a storm.

 

Isn't that a generous offer?!? Come clean up my property and, as an added bonus for me you, you can haul it off.  Score.

It's Been A While-Dad Update

Hi Friends!

I apologize in my lack of updating about Dad.  The good news is that there hasn't been too much to update you guys on.  I'll try to recap the more important/crucial items.  Overall, he is doing pretty well.  He is still in the long term acute care hospital. He has had a few setbacks  in the last few weeks that are discouraging, but not life-threatening or non-reversible at this point.  We are thankful for that.

Dad has been fully weaned off of both the respirator and any supplemental oxygen!  What a miracle!

He is still getting dialysis 3 times a week and I understand that to be the plan indefinitely at this point.  He did have a pretty severe infection and they located the source of his infection to the port where he gets the dialysis.  So they operated (or maybe it was just a procedure, I am not sure as to the correct term) on him today to replace that. 

He was making progress in eating a few weeks ago, but aspirated his food pretty severely several times.  If you recall, initially aspiration during emergency surgery was what got him into this mess.  Because of the recent aspiration, he had to go back to a feeding tube and nothing by mouth.  They tried him with some applesauce this week and he aspirated that.

Mentally, he is mostly totally coherent, but he does still have moments of confusion and paranoia.  But, really, who doesn't?

He has days when he is discouraged and bored, days when he is grumpy, and days when he is in a good mood and has everyone laughing.  He's enjoyed the visitors that he has had as it is a break from the monotony. Thank you if you have visited him.  It really has encouraged him.

Last week, he said to me, "I have a long way to go. I could really use some prayer."  I told him that everyone had been praying for him and that those prayers, I truly believe, are a big part of why he has made such great progress. 

He does make an unintentional point, though, that though he is no longer fighting for his life, he is now aware of everything that is going on and it can be overwhelming.  In some ways, this is harder for him.

Please continue to pray for him to improve and for him to be encouraged.

Also, in this facility, they have roommates.  Dad's roommate, Fred, came into the hospital about the time that Dad did.  We have gotten to know Fred, his wife, and some of their family.  It appears that Fred will not recover from his lung and breathing challenges.  Please pray for Fred to recover and, if he does not recover, for comfort and wisdom for his family.  It is such a hard situation that he, his family, and his doctors are in.

Thank you, all, so much for your prayers and support.

I'm Behind on the Updating!

Many of you have asked for Dad updates.  I am sorry for not being as frequent with them as of late. 

Thankfully, he is not in such a critical state.  He is in a recuperating/recovering phase which is slow and a bit painful to watch (Well, it all is painful to watch...but this is a different kind of painful for the observer, I guess).  But he is making good progress, nonetheless.

They have him off of the respirator machine for 16 hours a day, with just supplemental oxygen.  He has been able to tolerate ice chips in the last few days and today they gave him some applesauce that he was also able to tolerate.

He is still getting dialysis 3 times a week. He is getting daily speech, occupational, and physical therapy.

He has been able to tolerate the speaking valve for a few hours each day (with a trachea, you can't speak unless you have a valve inserted).

He is (understandably) very confused, tired, and listless.  The term the staff use is "delusional," which I understand to be expected considering how sick he was and how much medicine he was (and still is) on.

Please pray for him to be encouraged and to be content within this challenging and frustrating situation.  Thank you for your support, prayers, and encouragement.

Dad's New Digs

Dad is doing fairly well this week at the acute care hospital.  He is awake some (though still quite sleepy) and is looking more and more like himself.

He is still getting dialysis, though it is now every other day.

They are also letting him try periods of time with just oxygen and no machine breathing for him.

They have started physical, occupational, and speech therapy as well.  He is very confused.  Though he knows his name, he does not know the year or month among other things.  I understand this to be very normal with someone who has been on so many medications and been so sedated for so long.

He is really wanting to try and get off of the bed a lot.  He has managed to pull loose his oxygen tube and his feeding tube.  Because of his confusion, you cannot simply tell him not to do such things.  Plus, even if he wasn't confused, he is not the type to necessarily abide by rules placed on him by others.  :)

Please pray for Dad to regain strength and for mental clarity.  Please pray for his oxygen needs and dialysis needs to continue to decrease.
Throughout this whole process, he has had trouble with white blood cell counts going up, which is often an indicator of infection.  They have had trouble diagnosing/locating the source of this.  They are still trying to get the white cell counts to go down.  Please pray that they will.

Truly, Dad has had astonishing improvements. They are nothing short of miraculous.  I am so thankful for prayers of friends and strangers alike.  We see your prayers coming to life, literally.  Oftentimes, prayers are not necessarily answered in the ways we would like them to be.  And that is ok. But, at this point in Dad's journey, we are blessed to see specific prayers answered.  Words fail me to adequately express this.

Words also fail me to express my gratefulness to everyone. For prayers, meals, childcare, texts, emails, hugs, hospital visits, words of concern, silent support.  For it all. Thank you so very much.  Please keep praying.

Blessed beyond measure,
Zoe

He's Awake!

Hi Friends! I apologize for my delay in updating this blog regarding Dad.  It's been a busy few days and a lot of progress has been made. 

And I want to apologize if the following update is not succinct and clear.  I am one tired gal.  And a lot has happened that is challenging to recall.

Dad is doing a lot better.  He is awake (!!) and comfortable.  I guess he just needed a good solid month of sleep?  :)  He is responding with nods and smiles now.  What a sweet answer to prayer!

Because he was improving, the staff at the hospital were able to transfer him to a long term acute care hospital (LTACH) specializing in pulmonary rehabilitation.  On Wednesday, the doctors talked to us again about the LTACH and said it would be weeks away.  (They had talked to us about it previously; however, that was before he had some of his more major set backs.  They had not mentioned it lately as he was so critical and they were more concerned about short term stabilization than the long term recovery).  On Thursday, they said he would likely be transferred Friday.  And he was!  What a great, positive improvement.

He is still getting daily dialysis.  Before he left the first hospital, he was seen by a cardiologist regarding his irregular heart beat.  The cardiologist indicated that is normal for someone who has been so ill for so long.  The body is under a great deal of stress (to say the least!) and the heart has to work extra hard.  They gave him some (more) medicine to help with that.

They are going to start trying to do dialysis every other day now, so our prayer would be that he would be able to handle that and that his kidney function would kick back in some.


We are thankful that he is calm and relaxed while awake.  We are praying that remains the same.

Thank you for your continued prayers and support!

Midweek Dad Update

Not much has changed with Dad since I last posted.  The only fairly significant thing would be the fact that he heart rate tends to get really fast at times as well as beat irregularly. This has been happening already for some time; however, it seems to be occurring more frequently as the days pass. 

They called in a cardiologist and the cardiologist said that when the body is under that much stress being so ill, that sometimes will happen.  He added a medicine and Dad's heart rate went back to an acceptable rate.

He's been doing dialysis daily still. I think this is day 8 or 9 of it.

Today marks 4 weeks that Dad has been in this situation. 

We are praying for him to be able to handle reduced sedation and for him to improve.  One doctor, actually my friend Darlene's husband (small world!), encouraged us by saying that he has been so ill for so long that for him to remain the same is a positive.

Again, words cannot express our thanks for your prayers and support!

Many of you may not know my dad or know him well.  Here is a humorous post I did on him last year.  He is definitely a character. Hope you enjoy!

Short Dad Update

Our pic from a few years ago...

Well, things with Dad have been kind of the same for the last few days.  Honestly, that is a welcome relief after some of the ups and downs we have been having.

He is on Day 6, I believe, of dialysis.  It is working well to reduce the fluid in his body.  Initially they were only going to do 3 days, but they have extended it.

While it is good that he is doing well on the dialysis, we are praying for his kidney to start doing that work.

Also, Dad is not "mentally" responsive whenever they pull him off of the sedation.  This is a concern. Whenever they do reduce his sedation, his heart rate becomes erratic and other vitals kind of go askew.  But, he is not responding to commands to open his eyes or squeeze hands. 

Please pray for Dad's kidney function to improve.

Please also pray for him to be able to respond to the doctors' and nurses' commands.  I believe they are bringing in a neurologist for him tomorrow.  Neurologically speaking, there was something strange that appeared on his CT Scan the other day.  It may have been something that was already there before this hospitalization, but they want to be sure they have everything covered.  We hope it was nothing as his list of current physical challenges is already long!

Please pray for him to be able to handle reduced sedation.

Continue to pray for the doctors, nurses, and medical staff.

Thank you so much!

Dialysis and Such

Thank you for your prayers, specifically the prayers for the 4 liters of fluid to be removed on the first day of dialysis.  They were able to remove that much, which is exciting.  And a direct answer to prayer.

Dad is on day 3 of dialysis, with more planned for Friday and Saturday, assuming his body can tolerate it.

The doctors seem to think he is responding well to it and the pressure in his belly region has decreased.

In addition to Dad having fluid in his lungs, he has some fluid on the outside of the lungs as well.  There is a procedure to drain that fluid.  They did the procedure on one side of the lungs yesterday and are currently doing the other side as I type.  They seemed pleased with the amount of fluid they were able to pull out of his body.

While all of these are baby steps, they are greatly encouraging.  I am hesitant to get too excited as previously he has had some small steps forward only to take significant ones backward.  But, regardless, I am thankful for these tiny steps.

Please pray for him to be able to tolerate dialysis, for continuing to make progress forward, and for increased organ functionality.

Your prayers are keeping us afloat.  Thank you!

Tuesday

On Monday, they did another CT Scan to see if they could figure out what is going on with Dad.  It was one of those things where you kind of wanted them to find something but you kind of didn't either.  Well, they didn't find anything.  The good news is that he had no trouble being transported for the CT Scan. 

His blood cultures and all tests keep coming up negative.  While that is good that they cannot find an infection, they also can't get to the source of why Dad is getting worse with each day.  It's quite discouraging, to be honest.

The consistent issue I hear from each doctor, regardless of their specialty and what area of the body they are focusing on, is that he has too much fluid in his body and he is not outputting enough. 

They started dialysis on him just now.  They are hoping to get out 4 liters today.

While the doctors are puzzled as to why he is not improving, there is a slight glimmer of hope today.  They are now wondering if he may have too much pressure in his belly region.  If this were the case, that would explain his fluctuating blood pressure, kidney troubles, and some of his general instability.

They are hoping that the dialysis will help relieve some of this pressure.  If it does not, they could open his belly to relieve some of the pressure, but they really do not want to do that.

So, I think the main prayers are for the dialysis to be successful, for them to get the 4 L of fluid they are hoping for, and for him to improve!  Oh, how I would love for him to improve!

Monday Quick Update

Dad's kidney function has continued to decrease some.  They have tried several different things for the last few days to try to help the kidney improve and it is not.  The kidney function is just one of the many challenges his body is encountering.

They are going to do another CT scan shortly. This is risky to move him, but it is also risky to not take another look inside to try to figure out what is going on.  They are wondering if his gall bladder is not functioning and could be a cause of the kidney and fluid trouble.

The days seem to get harder and scarier.  However, I can truly say that we are feeling the prayers.  Please continue praying.

Specific requests:

Please pray for Dad's kidney function to improve.
Please pray for Dad's procedure today to go well, without any problems.
Please pray that the doctors will gain new insight into what may be going on.
Please pray for wisdom and guidance for the doctors, nurses, technicians, etc.
Please pray for strength and encouragement for mom and myself.

Again, I would like to reiterate that the prayers are being felt.  They are priceless. Thank you.

Another Quick Update

Dad got the trachestomy yesterday without any challenges. We are thankful for that.  He looks more comfortable.  He is still sedated though they are going to try to back off on some of the sedation today to see how he handles being aware of the trach.  (He has not previously done well when he is not totally sedated).

His kidney function has been a bit of a concern today and yesterday (the function is getting worse).  They are going to change how he receives nutrition to see if that helps his kidney at all.

Doctors mentioned yesterday that Dad has sepsis as well, which is very serious.

Please continue to pray for Dad to recover and for his body to heal.
Please continue to pray for nurses and doctors assigned his case.
Pray for him to be able to be less sedated and comfortable.  For him to not fight the tubes, ivs, and trach.

Thank you so much.  We are grateful for your support.

Better Day, More Info

Dad is stable, comfortable, and sedated today.  All good things.  :)
The nurse today is very compassionate and helpful.  And happy to take time to explain things to us.  That is a huge praise. 

The doctor on duty today said that Dad has ARDS. I guess they diagnosed him with that (or decided that he had that, I am not sure as I was not present when Mom spoke to the doctor) Friday or Saturday when he had such trouble. The doctor indicated that ARDS alone takes two weeks to improve.  (Again, this is what I am understanding through Mom talking to the doctor and then relaying it to me).

Since Dad is on day 14 of the respirator and not well enough to get off of it, they are going to have to do a tracheostomy, which (as I understand it) is inserting a breathing apparatus in the throat.  It is a long term solution to patients needed breathing assistance as the respirator is only a short-term solution.  They will do that tomorrow morning.  It will be done by an ENT. 

The doctors have been very clear again today that Dad is very sick and that this is going to be a loooong recovery process.  The doctor Mom spoke to today indicated that dad will probably be in the hospital (and probably remain in ICU) for many months.

Though that is a daunting amount of time, we are thankful that they are foreseeing a future and a recovery, Lord willing.

If you know my dad at all, he is very spunky, independent, and energetic.  Once he wakes up, this will be challenging because he probably is not going to be excited about the long, slow process. 

Remember, when all of this first happened?  Dad didn't want to go to the ER to get stitches because he had a 7am dentist appointment.  And when Mom first called me from the ER to tell me about the stitches (because she had to cancel plans that she had with me that morning), I could hear Dad loudly proclaiming in the background, "Tell her I am OK!!! I am fine!"  We are hoping that his spunk will aid in him recovering.

Yesterday was definitely a challenging day but the praise in that circumstance is that there is a member of my parents' church that is a pulmonologist whose father experienced almost the exact same thing.  One of the ministers at my parents' church spoke to that gentleman yesterday and reassured Mom of Dad's quality care that he is receiving.  (It's something you know, but it is nice for someone in the same field to evaluate the situation objectively and reassure you as much as possible).

Please pray for Dad to remain stable.
Please pray for the tracheostomy to happen without any hiccups.
Please pray for wisdom for myself and Mom as to how to handle this long road to recovery.

Again, friends, words cannot express how thankful we are for your sweet support, your prayer, and your concern.  We are blessed.

Tuesday...Not So Stellar

Dad's oxygen is back at 100% and he is having trouble staying above 90% oxygenation level. 

His chest xray was worse and the pneumonia is worse.  There is blood in his respirator tube.  They are not sure why.

For various reasons, they are having to switch up his medicines.  Because of this, they are having trouble keeping him calm and relaxed.  They took him off of one sedative and are upping another one.  But he is not being sedated as quickly as they need him to be.

The nurse on his case today is not quite as gracious as the previous ones have been.  That is making an already stressful situation a little more stressful. 

Please pray for wisdom and guidance for doctors and nurses.

Please pray for him to be stable and then to improve.  For answers and a plan as to why he is having so much trouble.

Please pray for daily chest xray to improve and for his pneumonia to improve. 

Thank you, friends.
   
 ^{------------------------------------}
  Do you not know?
   Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
   the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
   and his understanding no one can fathom.
 He gives strength to the weary
   and increases the power of the weak.
 Even youths grow tired and weary,
   and young men stumble and fall;
 but those who hope in the LORD
   will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
   they will run and not grow weary,
   they will walk and not be faint.

(Isaiah 40: 28-31)

Monday Update

Well, I've only been here an hour and Dad has managed to give us a lot of drama.

He was doing pretty well when I came in.  His oxygen levels were at 50% and they had changed the respirator to where he could try to breathe some on his own with the respirator backing him up when he couldn't breath.

He was very agitated and fighting to pull the tubes out, but good (relatively speaking) other than that.

However, his vital signs kind of freaked out and all the machines starting beeping and all of a sudden the room was swarmed with nurses, PA's, doctors, respiratory therapists, etc.  They spent a long time fighting to stabilize him, calm him down, etc.   His heart now has an irregular heart rate which they have not seen with him previously.

His oxygen level now is back up to 100% and the respirator is again doing all of the work.

It's frustrating and scary.  Please continue to pray for him.  We are so very, very thankful for your support and concern and prayers.

Sunday Morning/Midday Update

There was a slight improvement in Dad's chest xray today.  That is good, though we were hoping for more than just a "slight" improvement. But, we will gladly take what we can get that is positive!

He's off of the nitric (sp?), which is good.  When things got super bad a few days ago, they had to add that in addition to the 100% oxygen at the respirator.  So that is a positive thing.  He also looks less swollen today.

He didn't have a fever today.  And his bloodwork has improved. 

They've been able to reduce his oxygen to 40% on the respirator.  Reducing it is good.

He is starting to wake-up some and gets very agitated when he wakes up.  They have to maintain a high level of sedation for him as he tries to pull all of the tubes and such out.  It is kind of nice to see his spunk, though, as long as he doesn't pull out any cords.  They are all quite vital!

Pray for him to remain stable with current oxygen levels.  I have noticed a pattern that he will start to improve on oxygen levels (to about where he is now at 40%) and then have a drastic setback.  I am praying for him to continue to improve.  Please pray also for improvements in his chest xray, cultures, and bloodwork.

Thank you, friends!

2:30 Update

We were able to go into Dad's room.

They have him off of the space age bed (pronate bed) and back into a regular bed.  The move went well and he remained stable.  That is a huge praise.

His face and eyes are very swollen but that is to expected with the pronating bed.

We spoke to the respiratory therapist and he indicated that the bloodwork that they did once they moved dad back to the regular bed is "greatly improved" and we are starting to "move in the right direction."  They changed the mode of the ventilator and that seemed to help. 

Please pray that they would continue to see these minor improvements. 
Please pray that his oxygen requirement would continue to decrease. 

Please pray that his lungs would heal.  As well as the rest of his body.
Please pray that his daily chest xray would show improvements tomorrow.  That daily chest xray seems to be one of the main ways for them to chart his progress or lack thereof.
Please pray for him to remain stable.

We were very encouraged after talking to the respiratory therapist.  It is nice to hear anything positive and he seemed very happy in the improved bloodwork results. 


As always, thank you for your sweet prayers and kind support. 

Quick Post-Prayers Please

They are removing Dad off of the pronate bed as they are "not seeing the results they were hoping for."

This is a little alarming for a few reasons.  One, because the doctors told us he would be on it through the weekend.  Second, because we understood the bed to be one of the last 2 or so options they had for him. And, thirdly, because moving him in any way is risky.  Additionally, the doctor had told us they had seen a very little bit of improvement in his lungs when they did the daily chest xray.  That seemed like good news to us but I guess to the doctor it was not really.  He said the faster they moved him off of the special bed, the better chance they have at another therapy helping him to recover.

It was all so strange as we left for lunch thinking he was staying on the bed for a while and then come back from lunch to find them moving him.

They keep stressing that he "is very, very sick."

Please pray.

Space Age Bed

All is stable.

Can you believe this contraption?  It's so unique.  It is rotating constantly.  And you can't see his face.  You can see just a little bit of his feet and his ears.

It is supposed to help the lungs drain.  Praying it helps him improve.

Thankful they were able to transition him to this without any hiccups.

Midday Update on Dad

Last night, Dad had a very hard time with the xrays and tests they ran.  They had trouble stabilizing him.  It was very scary.  They used the term destat.

This morning, I got to the hospital around 8am.  The critical care doctor spoke to me (Mom had gone home to shower as she had spent the night here) and he really scared me.  He made it sound like it was not super likely that Dad would overcome this since they can't quit figure out why he is having the challenges he is.

Fortunately someone from Mom's church was here and heard what the doctor told me.  She helped me remember what all the doctor said.  He said, "He's very sick and could die.  It's not hopeless but there is a good chance he could die.  It's not totally non-reversible."  Although it was upsetting news, I did press the doctor for information and do appreciate his honesty.

Basically, the xray showed lots of inflammation, no blood clots (which is good but doesn't help them understand what is wrong), intestine is fine (a little inflamed), and gall bladder is a little inflamed.

The top front half of lungs look ok.  The back part of the lungs have collapsed.  They are saying his lungs are badly damaged.

They are currently changing him to some sort of rotating bed that will hopefully relieve some of the pressure on his lungs.  I guess it is pretty rare and I overheard the nurse saying she has only done it once and it was 2 or 3 years ago.  The bed came with its own team of technicians. 

If that doesn't help they are going to try a different ventalator or something like that.

It's a risky procedure.  Any time they move him in anyway, he seems to have major trouble.

I'll update more later. Thank you for prayers!

Very Bad Night for Dad

Please pray.  Procedure went badly and they are struggling to keep him stable.  This is the worst he has been thus far.  He's hanging on, but not well.

New Day, New Mercies

Last night, as I was dreading today and the ups and downs of Dad's condition, I thought about the verse about God's mercies are new everyday.  That was such a refreshing truth.

I thought about it as I drove to the hospital today.  And that the verse is true whether Dad's circumstances improve or not.  Whether Dad comes through this or doesn't.  I have new mercies to deal with the situation.

When I first got to the hospital this morning, things seemed about the same, if not a little worse.  They were having trouble finding his pulse, the daily chest xray was worse,  his fluid output wasn't great, etc.

But there has been {some} good news.  While he oxygen level outputted by the respirator isn't as good as it was two days ago, it is better than it was yesterday.

He is more stable today for them to move him to do some xrays.  They will be looking to see if he has a blood clot in his lung as well some other things I can't remember.  They have confirmed that he has some clots in other parts of the body; a clot in the lung would explain why he still has a lot of fluid in his lungs and why he is not recovering well.  They are confident that he has some form of a lung injury in addition to the pneumonia.  They just need to figure out more details on that injury.

There is increased bacteria today, which is not super.  They are bringing in an infectious disease doctor to "just get another set of eyes" on his situation.  His chest xray looks worse.

My friend's husband is a surgeon at the hospital and Dad was on his rounds today.  He came by and saw us (my friend had already mentioned him trying to come by and see us).  He was kind and as reassuring as one could be. It was just nice to feel like you sort of kind of knew someone. 

Also, Brandon set up a Nook tablet so that mom and I could use it at the hospital.  Mom is thrilled to be able to play solitaire (and the like) games on it.  I think it helped break up the boredom and monotony for her.  It's pretty much impossible to focus enough to read, but solitaire is a perfect time waster. 

Many friends and family members have been offering to help me with the kids and meals.  Many also have expressed that they are praying and are faithful to check in on us.  I am so thankful for that.  So very thankful. 

I truly believe that any improvements he had today are because of God's mercy and answered prayers.  Prayers said from friends and family.  From you.  Thank you. (and please keep them coming!)

I'll keep you posted.

In the meantime, please pray for the following:
Testing to go ok today.  That the physical test does not upset Dad's fragile state.  Mom had to sign a consent form in order for them to proceed to do testing.

For answers from the tests and a plan to help him improve.

For the infectious disease doctor to not find anything alarming.

For quality rest for both mom and myself.

For kind nurses.  We have had pretty much nothing but kind nurses.  I pray that continues.

One of My Less Favorite Days

Today is day 7 of dad being in ICU, on a respirator, with pneumonia and not much better than he was a week ago.

There seemed to be a lot of set backs today. I'll try to list what I remember.

His oxygen had previously been reduced to 50% (this is good).  However, today they had to up it to 90% (this is not so good).

His chest xray and bronchioscopy (sp?) showed that there is still a good bit of fluid and congestion in his lungs.  This should have been cleared up some by now.

They checked for blood clots in legs.  He has some.  This is not so good.

They upped his medicine helping with blood clots.

While they were doing the ultrasound to check for blood clots, he starting shaking. A lot.  Almost like he was having a seizure.  It very visibly scared the nurse doing the ultrasound.  It's never good seeing a nurse noticeably bothered.

They had to replace his catheter because his old one had issues.

They had to replace an iv line.  They had trouble doing so and had to retry 2 times.

They can't move him to do further testing/xrays/etc that they would like to do because he is in too fragile of a state.

When I bluntly asked the doctor how discouraged we should be, he evaded my question.  Previously, they have been fairly direct with my questions.

He did indicate that he suspects the lung to have some damage (not just the pneumonia) that would be the source of some of these set backs.  I am not sure if we want that to be the case or not.

Prayers are greatly appreciated, friends.

Specific prayers would be:
for a good day tomorrow
for encouraging news
for lungs to heal
for reduced congestion and fluid on lungs
for positive news
for improvement
for reduce required oxygen
for rest and encouragement for both myself and my mom

Thank you so much.

We Interrupt The (Ir)regularly Scheduled Nonsense

For something a bit more serious.  Ok, a lot more serious.

I normally post about the mundane daily ins and outs around here, but my dad has been very ill and I am having trouble consistently communicating with sweet friends and family via email and texts, so I am going to post updates here until he (hopefully and prayerfully) is better.

To catch everyone up, here's a brief rundown of what has happened:
Last Wednesday (Jan 25), my dad was throwing up in the early morning.  He blacked out while throwing up, fell and hit his head on the tile floor and got some pretty serious gashes on his noggin.  Apparently this happened at least two times, but my mom only heard that last one.  She encouraged him to go to the ER to get stitches.  He was resistant because he had a 7am dental appointment he didn't want to miss.

Around 5 am (2 hours after the fall), he finally decided that he did, indeed, need stitches.

They went to the ER and he got 24 staples in his head.

They did some xrays and ran some tests to make sure he had no internal bleeding.  While he had no internal bleeding, they found that he had a blocked intestine caused by a hernia.  This explains the vomiting.  At first it sounded like he may or may not need surgery but after further tests, they got him into surgery rather quickly.

The surgery ended up being more extensive than they initially thought it would need to be.

Because this was unexpected surgery and because his intestine was blocked, he had some food in his system that had not yet been digested.  They need to siphon out the stomach.  They had difficulty doing this.

Because of this difficulty, that stuff aspirated into his lungs.  This is bad.

Because of that, he was placed on a respirator.  This aspiration of the fluid in the lungs caused pneumonia.

Because of the respirator and the discomfort it causes, he was heavily sedated.  He is in ICU.

He has been heavily sedated since then (we are on day 7 of this).  They have been trying to gradually reduce his oxygen levels on the respirator.  They are trying to get him off of the respirator but his healing is taking much longer than expected.

He still has an usually large amount of congestion and fluids in his lungs.

The consistent status we get from the medical staff is "he is still the same and not making as much progress as we had hoped" and "we are going to let him rest today and try X tomorrow".

Today was the first day when he is not the same and seems to be getting worse.  I will update on that in another blog post.  I am hoping today was just an isolated "bad" day and that tomorrow will be better.  I would be lying, though, if I said I wasn't pretty discouraged.

Your prayers are greatly appreciated.

Fess Up Friday-Not for the Faint of Heart

Happy has the stomach bug.

The stomach bug is no stranger to our lovely household.  We seemed to be unusually gifted in acquiring it and having embarrassing episodes involving it.

I am absolutely, totally, and irrationally afraid of all things barfy.  I get panicky and hot and nervous and anxious and I freeze up and on and on... I even start to think I am going to get sick.

There has to be a name for this condition.

Oh, wait!  I just googled it and there is a name!  Does that mean I can get some meds to cope? :)  Because I could use some right about now.

Anyways, I suck as a caretaker, family member, spouse, mom, and fellow human for those who are ill, especially if they have stomach issues.

In light of this and Fess Up Friday, I will recall a few of my many, many times I suck at being a fellow human.  You can laugh at my ridiculousness; I definitely do. And, yes, you should pity those who were sick and needed my help.

1.  When I was 13, my grandmother came and stayed with us a lot.  She was very sick with Lupus.  We were near a hospital with many specialists in the field of auto-immune disorders. My mom had taken her to one of the specialists and gotten her some new pain medicine.

My mom took my grandmother home and then had to drive an hour away to attend a grad school class she was taking.

Long story short, my grandmother had a HORRIBLE reaction to the medicine, there was a horrible thunderstorm, no cell phones (before there were cell phones), and no one but me and my very sick grandmother home.  I threw her a bucket and a roll of paper towels (after massive begging on her part) and hid in my bedroom closet. And cried.  For hours.

2. My friend, Adrienne, spent the night at my house when we were in about 5th grade.  The next morning, we went to Burger King on the way to my soccer practice.  She threw up in our car and I pretty much plastered myself against the window on the other side of the car.  I didn't invite her over for many months after that.  Not because she wasn't a good friend and not because I didn't enjoy hanging out with her, but because of my irrational fear of all things barf.

3. My precious college roommate, Katie, got very sick our freshman year of college.  To make a long story short, I hid from her for a few days, which is kind of a hard thing to do since we shared a small room. Poor thing. I think I may have even spent the night (or two) in another friend's, Amy, room to further avoid the barf.

4. The first time Hubs got sick once we were married, after freezing and pretending I was asleep in our bed, I relocated to the couch downstairs and had little to no compassion for him.  He wanted assistance. I gave him none. Not because I didnt adore him, but again, because of this insane fear.

5.  It doesn't even matter if it is me that is sick.  I cannot cope.  When I was pregnant with Lil Miss, I was (briefly) hospitalized for excessive/extreme morning sickness.  I wanted to momentarily exit my physical body, not particularly because of the misery of not feeling well, but mainly because I could not handle the actual barf part.

Bottom line?  If you are sick, I love you.  But, PLEASE, do not call on me for help. 

It's better that way.  For all involved.

Be sure to check out Kira's blog. I think she may be taking a Fessing Up break, but there is still good stuff on there!